You can't make this stuff up! These are the blurbs of our lives...
The week Blake turned 18....Coop kept asking, "sooooo, Blakes moving out Saturday then?"
Blake got a card from Aunt Kristen....it was Michael from The Office saying, "Reverse psychology is an awesome tool. Basically, you make someone think the opposite of what you believe and that tricks them into doing something stupid....works like a charm." No more than 5 minutes later I caught Blake yelling at Cooper in the bathroom saying, "Cooper, DONT pick your clothes up from the bathroom floor! Leave them there....all the time!" Any guesses on whether it worked or not? It worked for Coop.
Leaving Vegas, on our way home, Curt asked the boys if they ate cereal before we left. Cooper replies, "ya but can we stop because i ate a bowl of cereal and it didnt even make a dent."
The boys were visiting the fam in WA. Kirsten (niece) texts me and says, "Cooper just pocketed silverware from El Mirador because apparently your knives suck!" OH Coop! Well, he's right. I hope he got a family set.
Coop has been asking the most pointless questions lately. Me Coop and Chase were in the car and after a multitude of Q's over a short period of time, I said, "cooper, there IS such thing as a stupid question. Most of the time you know the answer...you just need to think it over in your head and try to figure it out before you ask." Within two seconds Coop-Where are we going? Me-Blakes game. Coop-Why? Chase-OMG buddy!what did we just say? No more dumb questions!!! Coop-What? I thought it through first! Well, it seems as though we have a problem then.
We were watching a clip from youtube called "shizz Mormons say". If your not familiar, this guy doesnt swear but has words and sayongs to replace the cuss.... Its hilarious and true. So Coop goes, "mom, maybe ypu shpuld say stuff like son of a bishop sometime." Me-wht the hell is that supposed to mean! Haha jk. Maybe i should.
Chase went to St. George with the Soper's for their baseball tourny so it's a little weird around here, especially for Cooper because they are rarely apart. On the way to school, Coop from the back seat goes, "Hey mom, it feels like we are missing someone from our family." Im like, "what do you mean? We need someone else in it?" He replies, "Well, there's me, you, Blake, and Dad.....and who?" I started laughing. But, the funny thing is, he totally seemed serious, as if he forgot Chase.
Blake and I were watching Sixth Sense and Chase got a glimpse of something because he was in his room CRYING (uncontrolably) because he couldn't go to sleep with the bad image in his head. Not my best parenting moment to have it on with these guys around....but wait, my skills get better. I somewhat freak out on him saying, "Why were you even in there? Get over it, think of something else...." See! Nice huh? It's a good thing he has little brother to yell from his room, "Chase, you can just pray to Jesus about it...he'll give you good thoughts!" MOM:loser COOPER:winner
Me-"Coop, I just love you so much! You make my day." Coop-"Mom, why do people always say, 'I would be so sad if I weren't your mom?' Because, how would they even know them, if they weren't their Mom? It just doesn't make sense!"
Another thing that didn't make sense to Coop was when we were talking about giving gifts to kids who don't get any for Christmas. He said, "If Santa can get everywhere in one night, why wouldn't he give presents to them too? Just because they don't have anything doesn't mean they are bad....sooooo? It just doesn't make sense!" I thougth this was a good time to tell him about Jesus! Screw Santa.....he's not real....WE are real, Jesus is real. That's it.....he took it better than I thought:)
Cooper said he is never getting married because "I don't want to take care of her when she like goes to the hospital to have a baby..... That's too much pressure.....too much pressure. I just cant do that." As you can see, Cooper and injury don't mix. At Blakes game he was worried and grossed out when two players collided. I could only imagine if one of them was Blake.
One of the reasons we love Coop is because he is real... and he knows his limits. On Friday the little boys were home with Dad. They had a long day ahead with basketball. When I got to the gym, Coop said, "me and dad were grumpy today." I go, "what do you mean? What happened?" he proceeds to tell me, "well, i was yelling at chase cuz he wouldnt stop making me mad and Dad told me to stop yelling....and Chase hit me in the face. So I went to bed and took a nap. I felt a lot better when I woke up." We laugh because Coop always does this... when its too much, he shuts down and just goes to bed. I wish I could do that... Id be sleeping a lot! He did it the other night too when Chase got hos ipod touch and Coop was pissed that he was the only one in the family without "electronics". He was in bed ny 6pm
I was talking to Curt on the phone and he goes, "what are the boys doing?" I go, "they just piled up pillows and are wrestling and jumping on them." Curt responds, "oh, nice, are they in their underwear yet?"....and they were!!
Cooper said when he grows up he wants to be "the guy who makes stuff....like, collects animal skin and uses it to make fake ones that look real." he said it as if he made it up..... Its taxidermy coop, its a real thing :)
I told Chase he couldn't watch a movie with us because it had inappropriate stuff. He sais, "Awe mom, I hear it all the time." Im assuming, by the way he mumbled, "from here," he meant from me. But, there's no way to know that.....no way to tell for sure.
Well, the boys broke another window....of the neighbors.....playing baseball. $150.00 later, I'm ready for the country! They miss being out on our 15 acre farm, that's for sure! Boys just can't be couped up.
So, Curt asks Chase if he knows about the window. He sais "no." We find out that it, in fact was he who hit a wiffle ball into it. Curt calls both boys in, Cooper runs straight upstairs. Curt drills Chase, wanting answers. Cooper yells from atop...."I can't lie! It was totally Chase...he did it!" I love that boy.
As Im getting ready for church Cooper runs into my room and sais, "MOM! Chase just lied to me.....on a CHURCH day!" (because it's ok to lie on any other day, I guess)
I have a magnet decor piece that's in our bathroom downstairs. Its holding old pictures of my parents, me, siblings... Somebody keeps covering up the faces with the magnets. I finally asked who was doing it. Cooper sits in silence until he blurts out, "Well, I don't like them looking at me while I take a poo!"
Me-"Coop, you ready for your double header?" Coop-"ya....but Mom (pause), Dad's gonna be so pissed at me." (after a quick behind the shoulder check he continues in a regretful tone ) "I kiiiinda lost my hat." Me-"Don't worry, it's around somewhere." Coop-(in a mumble, walking off) "Well, not around here....."
The boys were in the kitchen cleaning up dinner. Coop and Chase were being annoying answering to Blake repeatedly, "But whhyyyyyy? But whyyyyyy?" So, Blake goes "Say that again, see what happens...." Cooper leans to Chase and goes, "Chase, Im gonna see what happens.....K?" And turns to Blake in a hesitant voice... "but, why?"
As Curt and I are cleaning out Coops room, Curtis reads on the wall in his closet, "I hate my mom and dad." Hahahahaha... silly, silly Cooper. He says the CRAZIEST things. LOL
Driving in the car, the boys look at the driver passing us and Chase says, "hey, that guy isn't wearing a shirt." Coop responds, "OMG, why isn't he wearing a shirt!?" Curt looks back at Coop and reminds him that he isn't wearing one either. Coop looks down and himself and goes, "yeoookkkaaayyy, got it."
Kristen watched the boys while we were gone. She texted me and said, "Coop ate a loaf of bread and 1/2 lb. of cheese....before his 2 grilled cheese sandwiches! Oh, and then he chugged 2 glasses of milk!" And another..."So, those two pizzas and pkg. of hot dogs you sent...what did you think that was gonna do? He ate those as an appetizer."
Last time we left him for the weekend with my dad, I texted him to let him know we were on our way home. All he texted back was, "We need to talk about my grocery bill." haha
Coop tries to feel me out by starting his stories with, "his friend." He is always saying "Mom, you know what my friend does?" "Guess what my friend did?" "My friend said...." and so on. This leads me to believe that either Cooper has a ton of friends, or Cooper has ONE weird-ass friend. Or, Cooper is one weird-ass kid:)
Cooper-"Chase, you can't say balls...it's a bad word." Chase-"Yes you can, balls is a great word." It IS Chase....it is......:)
Blake-"Mom, wanna know my philosophy on people? I like to think of them as a muscle....you have to break them down to build them up stronger."
Another "deep thought" by Blake...."I wonder what it feels like to be defeated." It was an interesting conversation that I found myself thinking "Ya, you're 16?"
Cooper asks me if "spelling it" is the same as "saying it" because one of his friends "spelled out the worst word ever.....the F word." I said, "Oh Coop, that's not cool at all." And he replies, "I know cuz he didn't even spell it right. You have to be able to spell it."
My Dad said he wants his gravestone to say "I told you I was sick..." Jokes on him, guess what we got him for Father's Day??? JK
We were having a BBQ with the fam and Kristen forgot something and blames Mark, "Dang it Mark, why didn't you bring them, you were suppose to remind me." Hearing how rediculous that was, I go, "I HATE Mark!" Little LuLu looks around and sais in warning, "Hey, Uncle Mark is standing right there."
Blake and I snuck out tonite to grab a burger together. We were just chatting and laughing about stuff and he goes, "See, why would I go out on a Friday night when I can go on a date with my mom." God, I love that boy.
Blake was perched on my bedpost, chatting while I tried to shew him out so I can sleep. He asked why I was grumpy and I said, "idk, I have a problem." He responds in a smart-aleky way, "let me guess, your problem is other people?" I replied, "Yup, Im sure that's it"... He gets me.
Since the world is coming to an end tomorrow......a student said on her way out the door, "Bye Mrs. C, see you in the Celestial Kingdom." Uuummm, there's just a FEW misconceptions with this statement:)
Me and the boys were going to St. George and stopped at the mini mart. They saw a gallon of gatorade and said, "hey Mom, can we get that?" I said, "no, you'll have to pee like a racehorse." They immediately started laughing and still think it's the funniest thing.
I just heard Chase say to Coop "lets play chicken. We both run at each other full speed and whoever ducks out first loses..."
Chase went to an overnight camp with school. He and Coop usually walk to and from school together so, this day, Coop had to come home on his own. The night Chase got back he said to Cooper, "I couldn't sleep last night cause I was worried about you. I thought about you all night"........and then he bounced a large bouncy ball off of his head. I never win this game:)
Cooper at 7:30 a.m. on a school day- "Mom, Mom, Mom!...Im bored." Me-"Gee, sorry buddy, the clowns are late today." OMG
I love the time and talks that Blake and I have. Today he goes, "Mom, I just love you! You are so awesome." I reply, "That's sweet Blake, you are one fine catch yourself! Careful, you'll probably end up marrying someone just like me hahah." And he said sincerely, "Really, there is no one like you." Insert me choking up.....until he continues under his breath, "Thank-God" (im sure he was totally kidding about that last part:)
Blake is "training" Cooper on how to pick up his clothes and hang up his towel after he showers because he is sick of cleaning up little bro's crap all the time. I see Cooper trapped in the bathroom as Blake is lecturing him to no end. I let it play out for a bit...knowing he lost him 5 min. ago. Im trying to explain to Blake that I would love to raise his little brothers...if he would just give me a chance!
The boys and I popped some popcorn and were deciding on a movie to watch. Chase and Coop say, "it can't be PG-13." So, I say "how about Hot Rod...again?" Cooper looks at the back and goes, "oh my gosh mom, this is PG-13, how come Ive seen it before?" Im like, "cuz it's hilarious, get over it!" I guess it goes to show, kids turn out just fine regardless of moms indiscretion:)
Cooper-"Mom, do we know a lawyer?" Me-"Uuuhhhmmm... why?"
Chase and Cooper were rough housing and as Coop was walking away, Chase jumped on his back and brought him down. Coop yelled, "Chase! You can't attack someone when they don't know....it's a rule of life!" SO TRUE.....even at six, the boys knows!
While tucking Cooper in he askes, "who will die first, me or you?" I tell him that we don't make that decision. He sais, "what if you die before Im 10?" I say that you are lucky to have so many people who love and will take care of you. Blake will be able to help. Cooper- "Oh man, I hate Blake." Hey Cooper, can't we just read Goodnight Moon, give hug and kiss and go to bed? Sheesh!
Cooper begs me to let him "play with friends" everyday after school. He's all upset because "I never get to play with my best friend ever!" I ask, "who is your best friend?" He replies, "uhmmm, I forget his name...Rrrryan? ya, it's Ryan, my best friend." Ya, sounds like it Coop
Coop-"mom, what does 'useless' mean?" Mom-"it means it doesn't do anything for you, can't be used....why?" Coop-"oh, nothing....it's just what daddy says to blake."
Cooper and Chase were making a deal and cooper goes "promise?" Chase is like "ya" Coop- "are your fingers crossed? your hair? your legs? your weiner?" Chase said "weiner?" and coop replies "ya, your weiner can be crossed....is it?" That is ONE talented kid
Every time we pass the cemetary Coop asks "is that where Grandma Brackett lives?" (sad, I know) I explain that it's where her body is and her spirit is in heaven. He then asks if there is food in Heaven. Me-well you have anything you would ever want. He goes "So, toilets?... yes, I can have drinks and go poo."
Cooper said the reason he needs a mini fridge in his room is "macuz if I break my leg I can still eat and have drinks...and if I don't then I would break my other leg going down the stairs to eat" He HAS a valid point
Cooper told Grandma, "Do you know I love dips? But....I love you more than my favorite dip."
Coopers word...yammacuz. It means "ya because..."
Cooper was soooo hungry and wanted me to cook burritos for him. He kept asking and asking while I told him to wait a minute while I finish something. I got up and gave him a hug and said "Ok Cooper, let me get you something to eat. Thanks for waiting paitently" He sais "patience? whats that?" I told him it means you wait nicely and quietly. He gets a confused look on his face and sais, "Mom, I wasn't paitent I asked a million times to get my burritos....that's not patience." I guess he was right. However, I was being sarcastic
Coop wanted Blake to let him have TJ over (Blake was babysitting) So Blake said "only if you walk on my back" he did and then Blake said "K, now give me a hug" so he layed on Blakes back and gave him a hug. Then Cooper goes "Blake can you turn around....this is a little disturbing."
Cooper said he thinks we should collect glass bottles....to use for home security. We could break them on the bad guys heads. WOW
Cooper got mad at me because he wasn't listening and i made him sit for a few minutes. When he came around to talking he said, "mom, guess what ruined my perfect day?" I ask "What?" He replies "you." As if that's not the first time I've ever heard that.
Grandma and Grandpa Cleveringa came to visit and Cooper tells Grandma that "sometimes kids miss school because they are sick.....but sometimes they miss because their Grandma's are here."
I over heard Chase tell Coop "dude, your breath smells like poo, you need to brush your teeth, girls won't like you." Cooper replies "well, mom does." Chase said under his breath "ya, cause she has to." I love that Cooper thinks that I'm the only girl he should be worried about now.
Cooper and TJ have the funniest conversations. The other night Curt heard Coop say to TJ "friends don't lie....that's not friends. Lying is breaking peoples hearts"
I guess Coop has been taking this lie thing seriously lately. He stomped off the other night yelling "everyone in this family lies to me!"
One Night Chase (the pickiest eater EVER) asks "whats for dinner" Curt and I can't stand it because he doesn't eat it anyway. So Curt replies "Poop" Chase in disappointment goes "ahh man, I hate poo."
Bradley and Chase were in the back of the car talking about snapping turtles or something of that sort. Everything was quiet and Brad says "Im glad my first name isn't snapping." (his last name is Tuttle)
Chase took the computer charger cord and stuck it in the crack of his pants and said "mom....Im charged" I'm like "good, go do the dishes" Hah!
